Tapenade

Looks like garden mulch, tastes like what it is: one of the glories of Mediterranean cuisine, which is one of the great arts of the civilized world. It is the easiest thing ever to make a jar like this:




ie, a double sized jamjar. Which is done like this:

One tin anchovies
BIG handful of herbs from the garden (oregano, golden oregano, thyme, rosemary)
A red chilli
Three cloves of garlic
Three tablespoons of capers (big ones, but the ones preserved in salt are better than the ones in brine)
Couple of sybose (spring onions)
A little tuna (optional)

Put all this, with a bit of black pepper, in a liquidiser. Add in about as many wrinkled oily Greek black olives as you can get in the bowl. You'll be stoning them as you go, because the good ones are unstoned. When the undersides of your fingernails are all black and you have more than 75 stones beside the whizzing machine, put the lid on and blitz. Pour in good olive oil the while. A teacup's worth in the first minute, then see how it goes. Probably the same again, and perhaps even twice as much, as you get it to the consistency of supermarket pesto. And a bit of lemon juice (half a lemon, perhaps).

Good as a dip, on toast, and poured over hard-boiled eggs. Especially nice for breakfast. Anyone over 8 years old who doesn't like tapenade is suspect on the food front.